porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Randomize
