Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
