I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
