so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
