His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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