okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
