So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize
