i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
