shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I think my moral compass just broke
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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