You really coming over, don't trick.
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
pop tarts are not kleenex
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
