And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
