Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
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i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
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You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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