end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Fuck appropriateness.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize