we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
