it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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