OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
