Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize
