Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
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