do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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