Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize