Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
