I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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