It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
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