the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Randomize
