it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
