I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
