he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
God gave him joint rollers for hands
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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