I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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