In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
