I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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