did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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