someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
love makes seman taste better
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
