so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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