all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
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