we're blogging at a bar
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Randomize
