he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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