My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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