I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
