I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
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