porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize