I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
