Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
