Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
