bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
