You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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