do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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