I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
