a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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