Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
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