I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
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