We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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